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(I just discovered cracked.com. Sorry.)

The Photography section today features pictures from the Photoplasty section over on cracked.com, in particular their slideshow entitled ‘If Classic Movies Were Remade By Michael Bay.’ Enjoy.

I sound like a waiter. Sigh.

E.T. phones - BOOM.

I can just imagine it. E.T. and Elliott are flying serenely across the sky, and just when the bicycle reaches the center of the screen, framing the moon perfectly – catastrophic explosion. Instant classic.

Carpe diem motherfuckers.

I just know Poe will be the bad-ass, Shakespeare will be the hero-born-to-lead, and Milton will be the crazy, kooky dude spouting philosophies all over the place. I CAN FEEL IT.

Bloodstained Wall-E. Whoa. I cannot believe I just typed that.

The clear winner in my book. Plus, the actual movie has some pretty good audio of Wall-E shouting “EVE-uh!” already – just a shot of her in his arms while he wails that to the sky, and it’s Michael Bay all the way.


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